We just went from a family of 3 to a family of 5!! We finally got the call tonight (and of course my husband is working out of town) a set of brothers ages 5 and 4. C is 5 almost 6 and asks questions about everything. P is 4 and is such a sweetheart. He loves the dog, cartoons, and books.
Things are going well so far, but the craziness has only just begun.
Tuesday, February 28, 2012
Monday, February 27, 2012
Remebering the Heartache
Right now, in my life, I feel happy. I feel content and I am amazed at the blessings I have been given. Sometimes it is hard to remember what I went through to get to this point, but there are moments where the pain and heartache of the past surface.
I remember what it felt like when my ex-husband told me he had an affair and walked out the door. I remember the hole that was left in my heart that night and the despair I felt.
I remember moving on and living on my own. I was hopeful for the future but I knew deep down I didn't believe I deserved to be happy.
I remember the years of disappointment and despair I felt at not be able to become pregnant. Month after month trying to pick myself up and continue on when all I wanted to do was crawl into a dark hole and never emerge.
THEN...........
I remember my wedding day to my wonderful husband!
I remember seeing those 2 lines, and knowing that my time was finally here!
I remember the birth of my son!
My life has been filled with heartache, but it was that heartache that made me the strong woman I am today. It made me realize how happy my life is now (and even in the tough times I remember how much worse it could be).
So, those nights when I feel down and can clearly remember the heartache are also the nights when I can clearly see my happiness as well.
I remember what it felt like when my ex-husband told me he had an affair and walked out the door. I remember the hole that was left in my heart that night and the despair I felt.
I remember moving on and living on my own. I was hopeful for the future but I knew deep down I didn't believe I deserved to be happy.
I remember the years of disappointment and despair I felt at not be able to become pregnant. Month after month trying to pick myself up and continue on when all I wanted to do was crawl into a dark hole and never emerge.
THEN...........
I remember my wedding day to my wonderful husband!
I remember seeing those 2 lines, and knowing that my time was finally here!
I remember the birth of my son!
My life has been filled with heartache, but it was that heartache that made me the strong woman I am today. It made me realize how happy my life is now (and even in the tough times I remember how much worse it could be).
So, those nights when I feel down and can clearly remember the heartache are also the nights when I can clearly see my happiness as well.
Thursday, February 16, 2012
Saturday, February 11, 2012
Missed Call
So I have beening waiting for that placement call for over a month now. I think I stopped getting to worried about the phone ringing and started to relax. Well yesterday I was at my Aunt's house making laundry soap (which on a side note turned out really aweseome!) and I got the call.....except that I missed it!!! Really!!! I didn't notice the call until an hour and a half later. I tried to call back but didn't get an answer. Now, I am dealing with anxiety and what if's. Ugggg, well I guess we just start the waiting game again and somehow get rid of this anxiety!
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