Remebering the Heartache

Right now, in my life, I feel happy. I feel content and I am amazed at the blessings I have been given. Sometimes it is hard to remember what I went through to get to this point, but there are moments where the pain and heartache of the past surface.

I remember what it felt like when my ex-husband told me he had an affair and walked out the door. I remember the hole that was left in my heart that night and the despair I felt.

I remember moving on and living on my own. I was hopeful for the future but I knew deep down I didn't believe I deserved to be happy.

I remember the years of disappointment and despair I felt at not be able to become pregnant. Month after month trying to pick myself up and continue on when all I wanted to do was crawl into a dark hole and never emerge.

THEN...........

I remember my wedding day to my wonderful husband!

I remember seeing those 2 lines, and knowing that my time was finally here!

I remember the birth of my son!

My life has been filled with heartache, but it was that heartache that made me the strong woman I am today. It made me realize how happy my life is now (and even in the tough times I remember how much worse it could be).

So, those nights when I feel down and can clearly remember the heartache are also the nights when I can clearly see my happiness as well.