Update

It's been a while since I have been on here. WOW life really can get busy and stressful. Well after the brother left we got quite a few phone calls for placements. We turned them down. The placements just werent a good fit for us. Greg and I decided that we needed to re-evaluate the ages we were considering taking. We then decided that older children would work best for our family. Not long after that we got a call for a 17yo girl.
We went and met her... and decided to take her.
She was suppose to be here for a short time before going home to dad. Well...... of course that plan changed. So she will be here for a while....

So how do we feel about that, you ask?

We aren't sure.... She is tough. Not tough in the yelling, screaming, being defiant kind of way but in the low functioning, needs lots of attention, is more like a 7 year old kind of way.
I don't have any experience dealing with a low functioning, may not be able to function well as an adult, kid. So we are going one day at a time......

JUST BREATH!!

Goodbyes

The boys were able to go and stay with a grandpa. It has been really quiet and relaxing around here. When I dropped them off there were tons of family there to see them and they were happy to see people they knew. I am glad that they are able to stay with their grandpa.

I hope all goes well with them and their family!

A Thin Thread

These poor boys are dealing with so much. You wouldn't know by just meeting them, that something is wrong, but their little hearts are broken. They miss their mom and dad and don't understand why they can't see them. Their emotional problems are coming out in the form of "accidents"..... Yep you got it, we are surrounded by Pee and Poo everywhere. From bed wetting to pooping their pants in front of me, we have it all! We are truly hanging on by a thread here at this house.

We are waiting to hear if their family placement is going to work out, and not to sound mean, but I am praying with all my heart it will. They really are cute boys and I know that they need my patience and love. So we will roll with the punches whatever they may be.

Yes Sir, Right Away Sir

So when I picked up C from school the other day this was our conversation.....

Me: How was School?
C: Good, but I need you to write your address on a paper.
Me: Why??
C: I need to give it to a friend at school so his mom can bring him over for a sleep over. (Of course at this point I am just going along with the coversation not intending to let these kids work out a sleepover. But I didn't want to upset him over something that will no longer be an issue come tuesday)
Me: Oh ok
C: Um, I did something Bad.
Me: Ok, what did you do?
C: I told my friend that you were my Butler. (HAHA, where does he come up with this stuff!) So, when he comes over you will need to act like my Butler.
Me: Ok......
C: I just wanted him to think that I was cool so you will need to act like my butler and say, yes sir... right away sir.....

This went on for a while..... Seriously, so funny. He really does say some of the funniest things.

These Crazy Days

There has been a lot going on around here in the last couple days so here is an update:

It has finally hit C that he is in foster care. We had quite the meltdown last night. He really did turn it around later and opened up that he was upset because he misses his mom and dad. Poor kid he is so confused. I wish I could do more to help him heal, and feel better but there is only so much I can do. I am not their mother and that is who they want.

The night the boys came my husband was out of town. It was funny becuase even after I told the boys where he was they kept asking if he was in Jail.... :) I guess that is all they know, sad.

It looks like the boys are going to be placed in a Kinship placement Tuesday or Wednesday. I think that will be good for them, I can tell that they really need their family. I am glad that someone is willing to step up and be there for them.

P is really a funny kid. He is happy and likes to play with his brothers. He really likes my husband and is on an hourly update till the time he gets home from work. Cute!

It looks like this placement will be short but it was fun to get to know them. I hope and pray that they will be taken care of!

Welcome Brothers!

We just went from a family of 3 to a family of 5!! We finally got the call tonight (and of course my husband is working out of town) a set of brothers ages 5 and 4. C is 5 almost 6 and asks questions about everything. P is 4 and is such a sweetheart. He loves the dog, cartoons, and books.

Things are going well so far, but the craziness has only just begun.

Remebering the Heartache

Right now, in my life, I feel happy. I feel content and I am amazed at the blessings I have been given. Sometimes it is hard to remember what I went through to get to this point, but there are moments where the pain and heartache of the past surface.

I remember what it felt like when my ex-husband told me he had an affair and walked out the door. I remember the hole that was left in my heart that night and the despair I felt.

I remember moving on and living on my own. I was hopeful for the future but I knew deep down I didn't believe I deserved to be happy.

I remember the years of disappointment and despair I felt at not be able to become pregnant. Month after month trying to pick myself up and continue on when all I wanted to do was crawl into a dark hole and never emerge.

THEN...........

I remember my wedding day to my wonderful husband!

I remember seeing those 2 lines, and knowing that my time was finally here!

I remember the birth of my son!

My life has been filled with heartache, but it was that heartache that made me the strong woman I am today. It made me realize how happy my life is now (and even in the tough times I remember how much worse it could be).

So, those nights when I feel down and can clearly remember the heartache are also the nights when I can clearly see my happiness as well.

My Boys....

Here are my Boys!! How much I love them!

Missed Call

So I have beening waiting for that placement call for over a month now. I think I stopped getting to worried about the phone ringing and started to relax. Well yesterday I was at my Aunt's house making laundry soap (which on a side note turned out really aweseome!) and I got the call.....except that I missed it!!! Really!!! I didn't notice the call until an hour and a half later. I tried to call back but didn't get an answer. Now, I am dealing with anxiety and what if's. Ugggg, well I guess we just start the waiting game again and somehow get rid of this anxiety!

Still Waiting...

Also.... We are still waiting for a placement call. I get jittery on Tuesday's and Thursday's when my Resource Family Consultant has his placement meetings. Well so far the jitters have been for nothing. So I guess we will just keep waiting...... Stay tuned!

New York Anyone??

I need to tell the world that I will be going to New York to see....... NEWSIES ON BROADWAY!! I am so excited I may just listen to the soundtrack all the way there!

So I may be a nerd.... but who wouldn't be excited to go to New York!!! With my best friend as well.... Pretty sure it will be EPIC!

Crisis List

I just got an email asking foster parents to reply if they would be willing to be put on the crisis list. The crisis list is a list of foster parents who are willing to take children who are removed in the middle of the night, or removed out of "normal" business hours. I first thought it was strange because I was under the impression that being a foster parent meant getting phone calls in the middle of the night or on a Saturday, or Sunday (I mean, trouble in families doesn't only happen M-F 8-5.) So I replied and said that we would like to be on that list....
I initially hesitated sending this email as I thought of how difficult this could be not getting sleep and having to potentially take care of 3 kids..... Then I realized.... Mom's do this all the time (I guess I have gotten spoiled now that Tristan is sleeping 10 hours straight!!) ..... Kids deserve to have someone who cares enough to sit up with them at night and welcome them to a loving home on the scariest night of their of their life. So, I think I can handle some lost sleep if it means being there for kids who really need someone.... and at 2am I am ready to be that someone!!

Living for the Moments

When I was making this blog it took me a while to decide what to call it. I thought of all the other blogs I have read and didn't want to fall short in the name department.... :) So in my quest to find a name that would suit this blog the best, I came up with " If Only for a Moment, that will do."
I was thinking about the foster kids that we have had in our home and how hard it is to say goodbye, and realized that it was a good moment in our lives that we were able to love them, even if it was only for a short time....
and then I realized that even in life, my family, etc.... there are things that only last for small moments and then are gone.... I am trying to enjoy those moments more and not focus on only the negative or hard times (which is a lot easier said then done... right?)
So now that we have got settled in our new house, and have adjusted to being a family of three we are now active foster parents again, and waiting..... Sometimes I am sure that I am crazy, but I know in my heart that this is the path we need to take.
So cross you fingers, and hold on tight!! Its going to be a bumpy road...... even if it is only for a moment. ;)

The Begining

Here I am!! Starting a blog..... lets hope I can keep it updated! :)